the flip of a coin.
Do you go with your gut and try something new or do you go with what’s safe and do what those before you did in a similar scenario? That question made him feel so stuck. An OCD (obsessive complsive disorder) trait kinda stuck to the point of a possible need for a real formal diagnosis by one of those therapists that specialized in giving those diagnoses away. This therapist didn’t give the diagnoses out like candy, or like when someone shows up and says, “I think I have OCD because I saw it on Tik Tok”. Nope. It was nothing like that. It was more like, “Give me examples of your symptoms and how they impact your ability to function optimally.”
So you shared this one with said therapist. You shared it in a loud, audible kind of way and overheard yourself saying “I simply cannot make a decision to save my life.”. Your compulsion/s appeared to be checking multiple people for answers. You couldn’t leave your house without seeking this validation and this activity occupied 2 extra hours of your day that you could really be spending your time living. Really living.
The flip of a coin sometimes worked. But sometimes you’d secretly flip the coin again to see if the prior coin flip was a certain coin flip. A real one. One that carried weight. And truth.
So you lost your own gut and intuition with this relying upon others. You didn’t feel safe any longer. You were exhausted. Depleted. And worried.
“Hello, and welcome” your therapist exclaimed. “I’m really glad you’re here.” Pretend that you have a new tool kit with all that normally goes into one: the hammer, the nails, the saw, the measuring tape. All those tools from your past toolkit have gotten so rusty. It’s time to create new tools and put them in your tool kit. The success lies in, however, my not making the tools, this therapist told me, but rather you making the tools yourself.
Your progress will be measured in patience. Your progress will be measured in how often you use that tool kit and how you "get to work" with sitting in the discomfort to manage all that you have to manage.
Are you ready?
p.s. did you know that anyone with a diagnosis of post traumatic stress disorder (ptsd) has a 1 in 4 chance of experiencing OCD? We definitiely know that stress makes anything worse, including OCD. So maybe it's time for you, who may have some kind of traumatic event in your life to get the help that you deserve because OCD and trauma and stress and everything else cannot be tied up with a bow. Get the help that you so rightly deserve now before your symptoms worsen and cause more distres in your life....
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